I am really out of it. Right now I have enough time to finish all my assignments, projects and study for my finals comfortably. Normally I would be blasting through everything in super study beast mode but I am really out of it.

I am not really at the point where I can perform optimally. There are a bunch of little things going through my head. But I just have to keep going. I just need to keep looking for things to improve. I want to always make myself a little better everyday. There is no point in sitting idle while everything else is moving… well occasional breaks are fine.

Sometimes you wonder, what if I was there at that point in time? What if that was me? What if I went there?

You can spend a lot of your time wondering about what could have been in some hypothetical situation, but when you think like that, you are only living in a dream. Sometimes I still have these moments, but I realized… If I did not go through what I did, if I wasn’t in the places I was, I would be a different person. I am happy with how I am. Even thought there are some qualities I do not like, those are things I should accept. Or if they are bad enough, I should make an effort to change them.

I might always get the girl, but you learn from those experiences. When I do get someone, I can cherish her. The food I cook might turn out how I want it to, but when I do get it right, it is amazing.

The past is something to reflect on, not something that you can alter. The best way is to look forward and make it into a past you won’t regret.